Just recently I came back to Australia on a PR / Media trip consisting of media interivews, a stint on The Morning Show (Live TV eeeekkkk exciting!), Photoshoots etc etc.
Very very exciting, extremely draining and to be honest … very confronting!
It was so bizarre to step out of the life that I have designed in Bali, my comfort zone of The Bliss experience and managing the business, my own villa with Bruce the dog, my weird work hours and freedom of schedules and my health management of exercises in the pool and resting in the afternoons to keep the migraines and chronic back pain at bay.
To step from that life back into the fast paced life of Sydney media.
I have never felt so drained.
I forgot that people don’t make eye contact until they are introduced to you.
I forgot that the pace of life leaves meeting and greeting as the extent of relationships.
I forgot how soul destroying the rat race can be.
This was especially the case with my last interview for a magazine article that is very personal in nature.
I made a promise to myself when starting Bliss, when starting to blog and embarking on PR campaigns in the media, that I would always be raw and honest. And so I said ‘yes’ to an article where I bare my soul and some of the realities of my earlier life that were drowned in shame and secrecy.
Even now, my stomach churns as I write this as a reminder of the pain bought back up with simple questions from a stranger. Matter of fact questions from the interviewer who was as lovely as could be on a deadline and who oversees hundreds of articles every week.
Yet to me it was my soul, my shame, my past reality … which everyone will now be able to read about, including my parents.
Mum was so excited when I asked her to send some photos of me around the age of 16 (total bugger that I took all the good ones years ago and now they’re all in a box deep in storage and have been for a couple of years now!). Little did she know the content of this particular story will probably make her cry… or get angry.
I have to trust that in bearing my soul, the story is written with empathy and kindness … but I’m not sure it will.
Now everyone will hear about a secret I have kept.
And it will be hurtful to some.
I have opened myself up to be judged, to be ridiculed, to be raw in front of the masses.
I just hope and pray that it may help one person in some way and then it will be worth it … I hope.
My personal integrity made me do it!
I’m not sure if we are friends right now.
I may have to reserve that judgement.
Media is a great great tool for business, to let people know about Bliss, to share my own personal story that up until now has connected well with people and earnt some amazing airplay on TV, magazines, blogs, and Radio … even in a book!
But right now I am feeling very fragile, scared and vulnerable.
I am short of breath, I have a churning stomach and I feel like crying.
But that’s OK.
I just hope people have the capacity to be kind, and I have the capacity to draw on the courage of my conviction no matter what the outcome.
After all it is the truth … I just hope they tell a nice version of it.
NB: At the time of writing this blog the story has not been published so I cannot divulge any of the content or pictures.
Zoe Watson, Bliss Sanctuary For Women Bali – on being vulnerable publicly
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