Blog 19: Challenges

Posted on Nov 1, 2012

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Just recently life has been throwing up lots of challenges. They’re coming from every direction in every way.

My health is one major factor as everything becomes more challenging when I’m sick. It makes relationships harder to sustain, I make mistakes, I become snitchy and I struggle to get everything done. Being a migraine sufferer I rarely have a clear head  or any energy which is quite simply really annoying!

This last couple of weeks though the challenges have become even more personal.

I have had people I have never even met writing the most nasty emails making assumptions about me personally. I have had people who I have only met briefly also making undermining assumptions. I have had more friends drop off the radar and tensions have been high in trying to build quality control at work.

Although I know that what people think about me is actually a reflection of themselves and if I walk into a room of 100 people and do and say something each of them will interpret it based on their past experiences and current attitudes. Although I know that, I can’t help wondering whether I am this totally evil person some people seem to think I am!

Well the answer is no… and yes! lol

We all have a dark side and a light side. Everyone around us is a reflection of ourselves and our own humanity somehow. It almost feels like the more I try to let my light shine, the more I get struck down by darkness … migraines, harsh words, power struggles… but I know this is somehow the way it is meant to be.

One of the biggest things that has struck me personally … a huge personal learning if you will, is the way our attitude reflects our reality.

In creating Bliss Sanctuary For Women it always amazes me how given the same environment the same food, the same hostess, the same weather etc. how every women’s experience actually comes down to her own attitude.

For the most part the women who come to Bliss are so remarkable and lovely. They see the good, they connect with those around them, they understand that our hostess is there to help and does it with love. They bring so much joy to the other women around them. In essence they take responsibility for finding their own bliss … and they do in a big big way.

Nobody else can ever be responsible for us finding our bliss, our happiness, our joy, our sadness. We experience what we need to experience based on where we are at in this life at the time.

It is so eye opening to see the contrast when someone comes into this amazing space and can’t see the good because they can’t see the good in themselves. They think it is other peoples responsibility to make them happy. This is an impossible feat yet they haven’t quite worked that out yet and wonder why everything keeps going ‘wrong’ when really it’s just the reality not meeting their unachievable perception.

Often by the end of their stay they surprise the staff and hostess by telling them what a wonderful time they had and how life changing it was and it was the best holiday they’ve ever had, not realizing the impact they’ve had on those around them.

All in all it comes down to attitude.

If I choose to look for the good I will have an amazing time no matter what. If I am looking for the bad that is exactly what I will find…

And as a business owner I need to look for that too.

In the feedback I get I look for the constructive, not the emotive. But it is still hard to deal with nastiness … deep breath, move on.

With the staff we need to maintain quality control and keep the standard extremely high and I also have a personal relationship with them, I care about their family and what’s going on in their lives, I help them out with loans, special bonuses, I send our healer to their family, I buy their kids presents, I give them food and clothing.

It’s actually really hard to maintain the balance when I give so much and become their friend … I think this is almost an impossible dynamic.  So I am learning to be a boss … and still do all those things but be removed from it. It goes against my nature and I struggle with it. I am all up for a family style environment where we are honest, soft, hard, emotional, realistic, we work hard and we play hard… but this gets interpreted as unprofessional by some people. To be honest I’m not sure why?

My version of professionalism is to be honest, to connect, to communicate honestly, to be our best, to admit when we’re wrong, to make better choices the more we learn the more we grow … it IS integrity.  So I’m going to stick to that.

Yes challenges come into our lives in many different forms. But so what, we are meant to face challenges! Yes they hurt and cause pain etc etc but I choose to see them as growing pains.

If someone wants to become amazing at what they do … it hurts to get there.

So even though sticks and stones may break my bones and names do sometimes hurt me … I know with all the imperfections, I am trying my best and actually doing a pretty good job at it … so I choose me! I choose to listen to my heart and trust my instincts to have the courage of my conviction. I also accept this may be very different to the perception of those around me but as long as I know in my heart who I am then I can be proud.

So bring those challenges on Universe … I can only become a better person by accepting and overcoming them.

And Nelson Mandela once wrote something that touches my heart and spurs me on in the harder times …

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

So when someone tries to reflect their darkness onto me, I know its only because they are not ready to see their own light.

And I know in those times where I have been the one reflecting negativity, the same was true for me. And now I LOVE the light.

With Light and Love, Zoe xxx

Zoe Watson, Bliss Sanctuary For Women Bali – on womens yoga retreats, not for me!

Bliss Sanctuary for Women Bali is a unique experience that combines the elements of the best yoga retreats, spa vacation and a healing holiday all in one. No couples and no kids

Follow your bliss your way with an experience completely tailored to you. A health retreat for women experience without the limits. Choose what activities you would like to do, from unlimited yoga, sightseeing, massages, healers, shopping, it is all up to you. With all your meals included, every need of your will be taken care of. You can view all of our Bali Retreat Packages here.